Nightmare Wallys
by perilanner
Summary: ONESHOT - what the episode "Nightmare Monkeys" would've been like for Nightwing instead of Beast Boy.


Nightwing made his capture into one hell of a skirmish, but, ultimately, all parademons left standing managed to drag Nightwing to Granny Goodness' office. Bound and beaten, Nightwing ignored the pain in his one dislocated arm and worked on breaking himself free with his remaining limbs. But Nightwing's cuffs were unfamiliar alien tech and, despite all his reluctant efforts to emulate his mentor, Nightwing was no Batman.

At the end of the hall, on opaque door opened and Nightwing finally got to see Granny Goodness herself, as forcefully cheery as she'd ever been on television.

"Oh, hello Dick Grayson!" Granny said.

Nightwing refused to flinch when Granny said his secret identity, and refrained from recoiling from the snake's smile on the old lady's face. The acrobat couldn't let the witch see him rattled, no matter what troubled him inside. Up to, and including, the fact that this was all Nightwing's fault.

Goodness rose from her chair and picked up the helmet from her desk.

"Welcome, dear." Granny said." You're just in time to try out my newest invention: Goode Goggles 2.0."

The New God held the helmet up in the air, smiling up at the craftsmanship. The headset was twice as thick as the old goggles, and blatantly lined with New God symbols and mathematical formulas in dark red ink. Nightwing could only imagine what that helmet would do to him.

"You know who I am," Nightwing said. "You know I have no powers. So why bother?"

Granny grinned wider.

"Oh I _know_, dearie," Granny said. "But my goggles work on _everyone_, even you."

Nightwing made one last effort to wrench himself from the thugs' grasps. Out of impatience, Goodness kicked Nightwing in the chest and laughed at the 'whoosh' of wind that her foot knocked out of him as he flew backwards. The parademons chuckled as they brought Nightwing back to their mistress, coughing and huffing.

Gasping for air, Nightwing couldn't even think, let alone stop Goodness from slipping the helmet onto his head.

Looking at the screen inside the goggles, Nightwing watched a fizzle of pixelated electricity danced in front of his eyes. Grayson felt a sharp prick in his neck and muffled a scream.

Just as Gar had described, everything went weird after that.

When Nightwing opened his eyes again, he was panting on tiled floor. Already, something wasn't right: Granny's office had a musty red carpet (probably to hide the blood stains), but this floor was pale gray porcelain.

"Nightwing!" a _familiar _voice said. "Since when do you wear goggles?"

Nightwing looked up, and there _he _was.

"Wally?" Nightwing said.

The speedster, tinted blue and wearing his usual yellow and red costume, stood over him. "Wally" chuckled and offered his friend a hand.

Nightwing shuddered. The real Wally was dead. This _had_ to be an illusion. He couldn't let himself get sucked in. Ignoring the hallucination, Grayson reached for his head to pull off the helmet, but there were no goggles, just his ears, his hair, his skull.

"Way to leave me hanging, dude," the figure said.

Dick's head jerked up and saw "Wally," still holding his hand outstretched, waiting to pull his friend up. This time, Dick accepted the help.

Now standing, Nightwing took in the room: it was Mount Justice, but not the one he remembered from before the explosion. This one was only half-mountain, as it might've looked if the League had rebuilt it after Kaldur destroyed it. This mountain had been refurbished with spiraling metal and walls of glass. Sunlight shone down on the caves like speckles of diamonds, bathing all the cave's new equipment in a warm morning glow. For Nightwing, the sight of "Wally" and the cave was beautiful. And seeing this vision of the life Nightwing could've had was too much for Dick to bear.

Of course, Nightwing's best pal noticed Nightwing's wincing face, and Wally put an arm around his friend's shoulders.

"You like it?" Wally said as he motioned around "Mount Justice." "I wish I could've designed it myself. You've got some sweet ideas in that noggin of yours, huh?"

"Me?" Nightwing said. "So this _is_ my subconscious. Gar said you were just a manifestation of his mind trying to fight the simulation."

Wally shrugged and smiled.

"Gar watches too much TV," he said.

Before, Nightwing had assumed he'd be led through his worst memories by an approximation of his best friend. But this wasn't a memory, it was a dream of a future Nightwing wish existed. And "Wally" was _different _from Nightwing's memories: cheery and patient, and another word that _never_ described the speedster - content. Was Nightwing really standing here talking to himself, or was this "Wally" really..?

Nightwing shook his head and reminded himself he didn't have time to get sidetracked.

"Just show me the way out of here," Nightwing told his friend.

"Me?" "Wally" said in mock-shock, "But isn't this all in _your _head, _Rob_?"

For old time's sake, Nightwing glared at "Wally" and led the way to the kitchen door. Soon, he really wished that "Wally" had given him some directions. Instead of walking into Mount Justice's kitchen, Nightwing found himself walking in on Bruce and Alfred, drowning in painful silence at Wayne Manor.

Bruce looked up first, wearing his Batman costume with the cowl down. But the Dark Knight was patently out of place: his suit was tattered and bloody, and Bruce _never _wore the costume in the manor, unless he was in the Batcave. Except for _one _time, _that_ day.

"Where's Jason?" Nightwing found himself saying, like he had _then_. "Why'd you call me here? What's happened?"

Unlike _that _day, "Wally" was standing there beside Nightwing, still offering encouragement, but even he seemed unhappy to see _this _scene.

Bruce and Alfred didn't see "Wally" though. Batman simply frowned at the floor - another sign of someone losing their composure, which Bruce never did either.

"OH _NO_," Nightwing said. "Bruce…is he…?"

For the second time in his life (well, third time if you count this hallucinated reenactment), Bruce hugged his adopted son.

"I'm so sorry, Dick," Batman said, "The Joker grabbed him. By the time I tracked them down, Jason was dead in a pile of rubble."

Nightwing punched the cabinet and screamed.

"Damn it, Bruce!" Nightwing yelled, fighting the urge to sob in front of his mentor. "I could have done something. I could've _helped._"

"You weren't _here_," Batman said. "There was nothing you could do. Nothing anyone could do. This is _my _fault. I never should've let him put on the cape in the first place."

_And you never would have_, Nightwing wanted to say, _If I hadn't quit on you in the first place. _

Batman sensed the self-loathing emanating off Nightwing and put a hand on his former protégé's shoulder.

Nightwing choked back another sob and turned to glare at "Wally."

"_Why?" _Nightwing said. "Why do I have to see this again?"

"Ask yourself that," "Wally" said. "This is your head, not mine,"

Bruce and Alfred didn't react to any of this - it wasn't part of their script. It wasn't what really happened that day.

Nightwing pushed Bruce away and turned to the next door.

"Fine. Then I'm taking us somewhere else!" Nightwing said, expecting "Wally" to have something to say about this horror story.

"Sounds good," "Wally" said, and followed his friend to the dining room.

But it wasn't a dining room - the door led straight to the trapeze at Haly's Circus, moments before the Flying Graysons fell to their deaths. Nightwing shut that door instantly and sunk to the floor, shuddering until "Wally" again offered him a hand getting up.

"What's wrong with me?" Nightwing said to Wally.

But the speedster simply shook his head, and herded his friend away from the circus door.

On Nightwing's insistence, he and "Wally" tried another door - to the souvenir room. But when Nightwing opened the door, the scene changed again. They were back on Mount Justice, the _real_ one this time, and Nightwing found himself explaining Jason's death to the rest of his Team back then: Aqualad, Artemis, Wally, Superboy, Miss Martian, the Marvel Family, Tempest, and Troia. None of them were handling it well.

Tempest quit on the spot - he'd only joined the Team so there wouldn't _be _another Tula. To him, Jason's death proved that he'd never make a difference as a sidekick on the surface world. If Tempest wanted a better tomorrow, he'd have to start at home, in Atlantis, where he wouldn't have to watch more kids die. Troia chased after Tempest, while the Marvel Family, Miss Martian, and Superboy all scattered to the zeta tubes.

For awhile, Wally and Artemis stood in stiff silence. Wally clutched Artemis' hand tightly, looking at her sadly instead of focusing on Nightwing. Then Artemis pulled her hand out of Wally's and chased after the others. But Wally didn't follow.

"Wally, are you coming?" Artemis called to him.

Wally glanced at her, then at Nightwing. Frowning, Wally shook his head.

"I better stay back," Wally said. "We'll talk later. I _promise._"

The zeta tube buzzed, announcing the departure of _Artemis B06, _and then she was gone, leaving behind the three founding members, just like the day this _really_ happened. Like last time, Aquaman immediately sat on the coach and muttered in Atlantian. The rhythm of his words made it sound like he was saying a prayer.

And thus, Nightwing had to face Wally alone, just as he had the _last _time this scene played. Soon, Nightwing found himself screaming at Wally again. Nightwing had done the same when he actually lived through this memory, but now the words were different.

"Damn it all!" Nightwing said, glaring at the ceiling. "Are you even the real Wally this time, or just the fake one here to remind me that I failed _you_ too?"

"Nightwing," "Wally" said, "This is your head. Does it _really _matter which Wally you're talking to?"

"Wally" reached out to comfort Nightwing, but Dick knocked his 'friend's hand' away.

"I _know_ I screwed up, okay?" Nightwing said. "What's the lesson here?"

Sighing, "Wally" scratched his head and looked at Nightwing with the one expression Dick couldn't bear to see: pity.

Nightwing sank to the floor and buried his head in his hands so his 'friend' couldn't see him cry (as if the real Wally hadn't already seen Nightwing cry the real day Jason died).

"Wally" crouched beside his friend and cleared his throat. Grudgingly, Nightwing looked up at the speedster, and saw the same unimpressed smirk he missed from Wally most of all - it always meant Wally was about to tell Dick something only _he _knew to say.

"Rule #1 of Nightwing," "Wally" said. "Every victory is a team effort and every failure is your fault alone. It makes you a thoughtful leader, but terrible at taking care of yourself. Think about it: it's been years and all these 'failures' are still eating you away. _Lucky Granny_."

The real Wally had never said this to Nightwing, but it wasn't hard to imagine him saying something very similar if _he'd _been here right now. The words were so blunt, so telling, and so encompassed by Wally's classic complaint: "you're driving us both crazy and here's why." Suddenly, Nightwing almost believed that he wasn't alone in his mind, that the real Wally West was here with him after all. And that thought, as impossible as it was, made Nightwing pause.

"You _would_ think that," Nightwing told "Wally". "But what does that have to do with anything?"

"Come on, you're the detective here." "Wally" said. "What are you 'detecting' right now?"

"I'm _detecting _that none of this will get me out of these goggles," Nightwing said.

Nightwing sighed - how could he think with the ghost of Jason still looming over him in here? As if in response, the whole scene of Mount Justice went dark, and Nightwing found himself in a black void, with Wally floating beside him. Dick shut his eyes and willed his mind to return to reality. But, of course, nothing happened.

"Dude," "Wally" said. "Right now, all you need is a little self-reflection. It worked for Gar the Goof - it'll work for you if you let it."

Nightwing looked at his hands then glanced back up at "Wally." The speedster had his blue tint back and, if he squinted, Nightwing could almost see Tula and Jason looking back at him through "Wally" too. But just seeing them made Nightwing feel even worse about what he'd done, all the mistakes, all the bad calls _Batman _never would've made.

"Fine, I feel guilty about the people I've lost and these goggles are exploiting those feelings: so _what_?" Nightwing said.

"_So_ you need to get over it," "Wally" said. "None of us are gone because of you."

"Of course you are!" Nightwing said. "And I can't let it go or it'll just happen again."

"Oh, that sounds _'super'_ healthy," "Wally" said. "Is that an exact quote from _Batman's Guide to Emotional Destruction_, or are you paraphrasing?"

If they hadn't been floating in an empty void, Nightwing would've thrown something at "Wally." If everything here was an illusion, then why did this "Wally" insist on mocking him?

"If you want me mad at you instead," Nightwing said. "Then congrats: I'm pissed."

The speedster shrugged.

"That's a little bit healthier for you, I guess," "Wally" said.

Somehow, "Wally" managed to keep smiling.

"Well, 'hooray' for me, Wall-man," Nightwing said. "Maybe if you hadn't _left, _I wouldn't be thinking like this in the first place. _Maybe_ I wouldn't even be here right now!"

The speedster's face almost faltered, but he didn't flinch. "Wally" simply folded his arms and maintained eye contact.

"'If I hadn't left'" "Wally" repeated, pausing after each word to parse its contents. "Do you mean when I quit or when I 'ceased'? Because you gave me your blessing the first time, and _no one _had any control over what happened the second time."

Nightwing clenched his fists and kept glaring at this illusion.

"Of course I did! I was in charge. I'm supposed to protect my Team, but I failed. I lost Jason, Tula, and you, my best friend, " Nightwing said. "When things go wrong, they're _my_ fault, okay?"

"Wally" snorted - Dick had just proven him right, and they both knew it.

And, when Nightwing finally acknowledged his problem, he suddenly wasn't so mad at "Wally" anymore. He unclenched his fists and wished he could get away from this void, go somewhere where he could slip into the shadows, to somewhere where things made sense and the dead didn't talk back. But "Wally" wasn't leaving, and neither was this void, not until Nightwing said the magic words:

"I'm an idiot," Nightwing groaned.

"Oh yeah," "Wally" said. "Big time. But what else is new?"

"I saw this coming and I _still_ let it consume me."

"Of course you did," "Wally" said. "Because those weren't illusions. That was your _life_."

All the guilt and paranoia of those scenes, these goggles, had blinded Nightwing, but now, when "Wally" smiled at Nightwing, Dick got the intended message. Dick saw the warmth and support brimming from the speedster , the only response "Wally" could give when words wouldn't do.

"Listen," Nightwing said, "I don't know if you're the real Wally or not, but -"

"Dude, does it really matter right now?" "Wally" said, just as he'd said it earlier.

"It _does_," Nightwing said.

Dang it all, this might be Nightwing's best friend, back after all this time. How could that _not _matter? But looking at "Wally" - somehow the sane man of their duo for once - Nightwing knew the speedster wasn't _really _telling Nightwing to forget about him.

"Fine," Nightwing said, "I hear you. None of you would want me to scream into this void because of you."

"No, we wouldn't."

"You never blamed me. You did what you had to do to save the world, just like I need to do now."

"Wally" nodded and Nightwing finally let himself breathe.

"Thank you for helping me through this," Nightwing told his friend. His best friend.

"Anytime," "Wally" said.

And with that, "Wally" was no longer needed, and Nightwing was forced to watch the speedster's image turn more and more blue, coating Wally's face with light until he was just an outline, a shadow made of light with a big grin on his face.

"Wally," Nightwing said. "It's really you, isn't it?"

"Another mystery for you to solve," the shining outline said, "Later, Rob."

The speedster smiled brightly. For a moment, he was pure warmth, lighting up the void in blue, yellow, and red. Then, in a burst of lightning and speckled blue, he was gone.

Even after the speedster had vanished, Dick Grayson kept searching for his friend. As if to get one last rise out of him, Wally's light show had dried out Nightwing's eyeballs, because there were tears in his eyes. His friend was just a jerk: a lovable, snarky, sharp-tongued, one-of-a-kind jerk, and now Wally must've turned into a cloud too, because it was raining all over Nightwing's face.

Then Nightwing remembered where he was again. The tears, both real and imaginary, faded from his face, at least for now. Nightwing looked into the void and spotted Granny's face through the goggles, silently cackling over him, just the way he'd left her.

"Back to work," Nightwing said.

And a moment later, he was.


End file.
